Semblance of a White Rose
by Jimmy Ho
A silent night fading as a new dawn arrives. I witness the sun’s warmth permeate through nature. Providing a new life for the seeds that are maturing. Taking in the beautiful scenery created by mother nature. Strolling along, I was unaware of your presence within the public garden. A rose beginning to bloom its new white layer. Captivating me as your beauty flourishes with the rays of light, complementing your white radiance. A shine that isn’t intense but a luster. Unconsciously, luring my mind and body closer to you. Slowly, I hold you upright witnessing your intricate designs unravel. A fragrance follows through by the wind calming my mind. During my state of trance I become oblivious of the time. Morning transitioned to noon forcing my leave. Eagerly wishing more time to observe your maturation.
A few months have elapsed after our first meeting. Your once developing beauty has reached its apex. Other flowers pale in comparison as they are still maturing. Easily distinguishing yourself to become unique. Your beauty has far surpassed others, captivating my attention only towards you. Many of them wish to be on the same par with you, but you share your growth within the same soil. A kindness of your attribute that has made me grown more fond of you. Throughout the day I notice a shift in the winds. A gust that wasn’t gentle to the skin but a prick. I begin to shiver unable to deter this ominous feeling within. Anxious of your next form.
A state of your withering has arrived. Discoloration begins to form upon you. Brown contours begin to form on the edge of your white petals. Slowly corroding within creating myriads of apertures. You desperately cling onto your petals as they begin to fall. Failing to conceal your white layer, revealing your vulnerability within. I realized that the flowers around you have not withered. Fully intact and still presenting an aged beauty. Your generosity from before was returned with betrayal. They have absorbed more nutrients preserving their glamour. Leaving you with minimum reserves to tend to yourself. Now it is you that has fallen behind in splendor. A situation that has been reversed leaving you in scars.
Unable to watch you writhe in agony, I dug your roots out and placed them within your own world. Planting you with a vast territory of your own. A new haven without the fear of being denounced and betrayed. Alone and isolated you can’t withstand the wounds that were inflicted upon before. A permanent trauma that you succumb to. Your petals have cease to exist exposing your pistil. Revealing your acceptance of defeat and given up on hope. Vulnerable to harmful decisions. Your once solid stem are now bearing shriveled creases. A fatality to wilt and collapse. While watching, a new white coat forms upon you. A coat that isn’t alluring but contempt within my eyes. Gradually, the coat becomes encumbering for you to withstand. Concealing your beauty and burying you into the pale soil.
Instinctively, I become aware of your cold solitude and place you within my home. A Shelter of my provision and tenderness you can rely on. During your convalescence, I realized I wanted this to be permanent between us. I care for your survival and wanted you to stay by my side. A new warmth you can hold onto. When I tend to you, your thorns prick into my flesh. I do not mind at first and continue to grasp on. Blood begins to slowly trickle out of my palm.
Your blades etch deeper into my flesh generating pain. A pain that began at my hands circulating to my mind. Causing a revelation of my own ignorance towards you. The infliction of your thorns was a warning towards me. I realized your actions are out of fear and to deter anyone who gets too close to you. Afraid of suffering the same fate of betrayal again. All I could think of was only my selfish ideals instead of your conditions. I realized you needed a moment to comprehend yourself. Your original disposition finally revives, allowing me to return you to your origins.
The beginning of your white petals construct again. Your beauty has returned to how I first described it. You now live with new insight and hold your head high. A hint of fear still remains of accepting someone within you. Slowly sprouting to the person you want to decide. Hoping the person you unveiled to was me. The terror of trust changing into deceit still exist within you. Unable to accept but use the warmth I offered. My nurture to help you understand yourself. The boundaries of what I can provide for you. A desire that you could accept all of me within your roots. As I am waiting and have accepted all of you. Knowingly the painful truth of being incompatible with you. Wishing to believe that once beautiful lie.
To: *****
I wish for your happiness
A few months have elapsed after our first meeting. Your once developing beauty has reached its apex. Other flowers pale in comparison as they are still maturing. Easily distinguishing yourself to become unique. Your beauty has far surpassed others, captivating my attention only towards you. Many of them wish to be on the same par with you, but you share your growth within the same soil. A kindness of your attribute that has made me grown more fond of you. Throughout the day I notice a shift in the winds. A gust that wasn’t gentle to the skin but a prick. I begin to shiver unable to deter this ominous feeling within. Anxious of your next form.
A state of your withering has arrived. Discoloration begins to form upon you. Brown contours begin to form on the edge of your white petals. Slowly corroding within creating myriads of apertures. You desperately cling onto your petals as they begin to fall. Failing to conceal your white layer, revealing your vulnerability within. I realized that the flowers around you have not withered. Fully intact and still presenting an aged beauty. Your generosity from before was returned with betrayal. They have absorbed more nutrients preserving their glamour. Leaving you with minimum reserves to tend to yourself. Now it is you that has fallen behind in splendor. A situation that has been reversed leaving you in scars.
Unable to watch you writhe in agony, I dug your roots out and placed them within your own world. Planting you with a vast territory of your own. A new haven without the fear of being denounced and betrayed. Alone and isolated you can’t withstand the wounds that were inflicted upon before. A permanent trauma that you succumb to. Your petals have cease to exist exposing your pistil. Revealing your acceptance of defeat and given up on hope. Vulnerable to harmful decisions. Your once solid stem are now bearing shriveled creases. A fatality to wilt and collapse. While watching, a new white coat forms upon you. A coat that isn’t alluring but contempt within my eyes. Gradually, the coat becomes encumbering for you to withstand. Concealing your beauty and burying you into the pale soil.
Instinctively, I become aware of your cold solitude and place you within my home. A Shelter of my provision and tenderness you can rely on. During your convalescence, I realized I wanted this to be permanent between us. I care for your survival and wanted you to stay by my side. A new warmth you can hold onto. When I tend to you, your thorns prick into my flesh. I do not mind at first and continue to grasp on. Blood begins to slowly trickle out of my palm.
Your blades etch deeper into my flesh generating pain. A pain that began at my hands circulating to my mind. Causing a revelation of my own ignorance towards you. The infliction of your thorns was a warning towards me. I realized your actions are out of fear and to deter anyone who gets too close to you. Afraid of suffering the same fate of betrayal again. All I could think of was only my selfish ideals instead of your conditions. I realized you needed a moment to comprehend yourself. Your original disposition finally revives, allowing me to return you to your origins.
The beginning of your white petals construct again. Your beauty has returned to how I first described it. You now live with new insight and hold your head high. A hint of fear still remains of accepting someone within you. Slowly sprouting to the person you want to decide. Hoping the person you unveiled to was me. The terror of trust changing into deceit still exist within you. Unable to accept but use the warmth I offered. My nurture to help you understand yourself. The boundaries of what I can provide for you. A desire that you could accept all of me within your roots. As I am waiting and have accepted all of you. Knowingly the painful truth of being incompatible with you. Wishing to believe that once beautiful lie.
To: *****
I wish for your happiness
header image from PIXNIO